Where do I start?
I believe medical professionals are in critical positions to help people in their time of need, and as a church we want to help equip Christians in the medical field with the tools they need to comfort, counsel, and shine the light of the Gospel into the bleak and difficult moments of people's lives. Let's start with some principles, and then we'll get more specific later...
1. Do right by your employer.
First, I recommend obedience to the rules of your employer as long as it doesn't contradict Scripture. "Servants, obey in all things your masters according to the flesh; not with eyeservice, as menpleasers; but in singleness of heart, fearing God." (Colossians 3:22) If you're free to share Scripture, give Biblical counsel, and even evangelize on the job, then you're in a great position. However, some employers don't allow such freedom and it's the responsibility of the employed to honor that. In such cases, turn the situation into a matter of prayer that God would open the heart of your employer to allow you to share freely in the workplace.
2. Pray.
It's been said that all of our failures are prayer failures. The truth is, you can't prepare mentally for every scenario you'll encounter out there in the field. From weary discouragement to raging anger, you encounter the entire gamete of human emotion. I encourage you to have a routine of prayer, maybe simply as you drive to work, asking God to guide you and give you the words to say at the right time.
3. Do no harm.
When people are in crisis or pain, we understand the moment is delicate. If we say something wrong we could hurt them, and if we say nothing at all we could hurt them. Avoid cliches that you can't support with the Bible (ie. "We know they're in a better place."). Speak clearly, simply, and compassionately. Paul told the church in Thessalonica that the demeanor he ministered with was as a mother who's nursing her child. That's not a bad demeanor to approach hurting people with.
4. Lean on the Bible.
Honestly, the Word of God is the thing that comforts the most, and it serves as the authority and backbone of our encouragement. Anchor your advice in Scripture. It doesn't have to be much. Even just a simple verse or phrase can mean the world to someone, and it gives you direction in your counsel that you know is solid.
5. Aim for the Gospel.
Never assume someone is saved, and always understand that man's greatest need is to be saved. That doesn't mean every interaction needs to be about the gospel, but don't lose sight of the Gospel when interacting with people.
6. Listen.
Counsel is offensive if it's not predicated with compassionate listening. Everyone knows their problems like the back of their hand, and they may be looking to you for a solution. However, if they don't feel you have enough information to counsel with, your counsel will be regarded with suspicion and they'll tend to reciprocate by not listening to you.
7. Use the power of story to give hope.
Stories comfort. That's true when we're children listening to fairy tales, and it's true when we're adults with a broken arm. They help narrow down life to a moment, and they provide a way to express compassion. Avoid stories that are too closely related to a person's immediate problem. (If a person has an ingrown toenail, maybe don't share your broken femur story.) I tend to use stories from childhood.
8. Make connections.
Most people need a quick comfort and a word fitly spoken in their time of need, but then they need ongoing spiritual support. I welcome you to share my information with anyone you think could be helped by it. My phone number is (508)918-2073, and my email is pastor@trinitytexascity.com. Share the church's website, invite them to attend services with you, and carry invitations with you. I'm happy to make a hospital visit, even it means I have to drive to talk to a stranger. Just let me know!
9. Leave something with them.
I would be happy to assist you in creating a personal resource to those you minister to. Whether it's a bookmark, a keychain, or simply personal stationary - a small gift and reminder can go a long way. It would be best if it included the church's branding and info. so it encourages them on a path forward, but it should bear the mark of your personality. Resist the urge to be anonymous. People want to know you and allowing yourself to be known and remembered by name has powerful implications for people. God put YOU there for that person at that time.
1. Do right by your employer.
First, I recommend obedience to the rules of your employer as long as it doesn't contradict Scripture. "Servants, obey in all things your masters according to the flesh; not with eyeservice, as menpleasers; but in singleness of heart, fearing God." (Colossians 3:22) If you're free to share Scripture, give Biblical counsel, and even evangelize on the job, then you're in a great position. However, some employers don't allow such freedom and it's the responsibility of the employed to honor that. In such cases, turn the situation into a matter of prayer that God would open the heart of your employer to allow you to share freely in the workplace.
2. Pray.
It's been said that all of our failures are prayer failures. The truth is, you can't prepare mentally for every scenario you'll encounter out there in the field. From weary discouragement to raging anger, you encounter the entire gamete of human emotion. I encourage you to have a routine of prayer, maybe simply as you drive to work, asking God to guide you and give you the words to say at the right time.
3. Do no harm.
When people are in crisis or pain, we understand the moment is delicate. If we say something wrong we could hurt them, and if we say nothing at all we could hurt them. Avoid cliches that you can't support with the Bible (ie. "We know they're in a better place."). Speak clearly, simply, and compassionately. Paul told the church in Thessalonica that the demeanor he ministered with was as a mother who's nursing her child. That's not a bad demeanor to approach hurting people with.
4. Lean on the Bible.
Honestly, the Word of God is the thing that comforts the most, and it serves as the authority and backbone of our encouragement. Anchor your advice in Scripture. It doesn't have to be much. Even just a simple verse or phrase can mean the world to someone, and it gives you direction in your counsel that you know is solid.
5. Aim for the Gospel.
Never assume someone is saved, and always understand that man's greatest need is to be saved. That doesn't mean every interaction needs to be about the gospel, but don't lose sight of the Gospel when interacting with people.
6. Listen.
Counsel is offensive if it's not predicated with compassionate listening. Everyone knows their problems like the back of their hand, and they may be looking to you for a solution. However, if they don't feel you have enough information to counsel with, your counsel will be regarded with suspicion and they'll tend to reciprocate by not listening to you.
7. Use the power of story to give hope.
Stories comfort. That's true when we're children listening to fairy tales, and it's true when we're adults with a broken arm. They help narrow down life to a moment, and they provide a way to express compassion. Avoid stories that are too closely related to a person's immediate problem. (If a person has an ingrown toenail, maybe don't share your broken femur story.) I tend to use stories from childhood.
8. Make connections.
Most people need a quick comfort and a word fitly spoken in their time of need, but then they need ongoing spiritual support. I welcome you to share my information with anyone you think could be helped by it. My phone number is (508)918-2073, and my email is pastor@trinitytexascity.com. Share the church's website, invite them to attend services with you, and carry invitations with you. I'm happy to make a hospital visit, even it means I have to drive to talk to a stranger. Just let me know!
9. Leave something with them.
I would be happy to assist you in creating a personal resource to those you minister to. Whether it's a bookmark, a keychain, or simply personal stationary - a small gift and reminder can go a long way. It would be best if it included the church's branding and info. so it encourages them on a path forward, but it should bear the mark of your personality. Resist the urge to be anonymous. People want to know you and allowing yourself to be known and remembered by name has powerful implications for people. God put YOU there for that person at that time.
Counseling map
Giving counsel has all the pressure of an impromptu speech. (Imagine an awards ceremony where you're honored unexpectedly and the crowd starts chanting, "Speech, speech, speech!") You don't always have much time to collect your thoughts, so you'll need an immediate mechanism to organize what you'll say. I'll use the acronym S.W.A.B.
S
Story
As you listen to them, think of the essence of your counsel. Narrow it down to one or two words like "hope" or "love" or "God's presence". Then, think of a simple story from your life that would connect to your counsel. Tell the story in less than three minutes.
W
Word
Segue from your story to the Bible with a simple transition statement like, "You know the Bible says..." This brings power to your counsel.
A
application
Follow the Scripture with your direct counsel or encouragement. Use suggestive language more often than authoritative language. After speaking, it might be a great time to make connections and/or give them something to keep and remember you by.
B
break
Most people don't plan how to stop when they plan to speak, especially with impromptu scenarios! Knowing when to quit is almost as important as knowing what to say. The best way is to say what you need to say quickly, and then close in prayer. Say something like, "Would you mind if I pray with you before I go?"
Verses before surgery
Isaiah 40:29
He giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength.
Psalm 37:5
Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass.
Psalm 9:10
And they that know thy name will put their trust in thee: for thou, Lord, hast not forsaken them that seek thee.
1 Peter 5:7
Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.
Isaiah 26:3
Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee.
John 3:16
For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
He giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength.
Psalm 37:5
Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass.
Psalm 9:10
And they that know thy name will put their trust in thee: for thou, Lord, hast not forsaken them that seek thee.
1 Peter 5:7
Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.
Isaiah 26:3
Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee.
John 3:16
For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
Verses for Worry
Isaiah 35:4
Say to them that are of a fearful heart, Be strong, fear not: behold, your God will come with vengeance, even God with a recompence; he will come and save you.
Isaiah 40:31
But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.
Isaiah 41:10
Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.
Hebrews 11:1
Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.
John 14:1
Let not your heart be troubled: ye believe in God, believe also in me.
Matthew 6:34
Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.
Psalm 34:4
I sought the Lord, and he heard me, and delivered me from all my fears.
Psalm 94:19
In the multitude of my thoughts within me thy comforts delight my soul.
Romans 8:38-39
For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Jeremiah 17:7
Blessed is the man that trusteth in the Lord, and whose hope the Lord is.
Say to them that are of a fearful heart, Be strong, fear not: behold, your God will come with vengeance, even God with a recompence; he will come and save you.
Isaiah 40:31
But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.
Isaiah 41:10
Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.
Hebrews 11:1
Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.
John 14:1
Let not your heart be troubled: ye believe in God, believe also in me.
Matthew 6:34
Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.
Psalm 34:4
I sought the Lord, and he heard me, and delivered me from all my fears.
Psalm 94:19
In the multitude of my thoughts within me thy comforts delight my soul.
Romans 8:38-39
For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Jeremiah 17:7
Blessed is the man that trusteth in the Lord, and whose hope the Lord is.
Verses for tragedies
Psalm 34:18
The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.
Psalm 46:1-3
God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore will not we fear, though the earth be removed, and though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea; though the waters thereof roar and be troubled, though the mountains shake with the swelling thereof. Selah.
Psalm 121:1-2
I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the Lord, which made heaven and earth.
Matthew 5:4
Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted.
Revelation 21:4
And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.
Matthew 11:28
Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.
1 Peter 5:7
Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.
Psalm 73:26
My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion for ever.
The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.
Psalm 46:1-3
God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore will not we fear, though the earth be removed, and though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea; though the waters thereof roar and be troubled, though the mountains shake with the swelling thereof. Selah.
Psalm 121:1-2
I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the Lord, which made heaven and earth.
Matthew 5:4
Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted.
Revelation 21:4
And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.
Matthew 11:28
Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.
1 Peter 5:7
Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.
Psalm 73:26
My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion for ever.
Verses about faith
Hebrews 11:1
Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.
Hebrews 11:6
But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him.
Romans 10:17
So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.
Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
Psalm 37:5
Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass.
Luke 1:37
For with God nothing shall be impossible.John 3:16
Ephesians 2:8-9
For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: not of works, lest any man should boast.
Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.
Hebrews 11:6
But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him.
Romans 10:17
So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.
Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
Psalm 37:5
Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass.
Luke 1:37
For with God nothing shall be impossible.John 3:16
Ephesians 2:8-9
For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: not of works, lest any man should boast.
Verses about loss
Psalm 73:26
My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion for ever.
John 11:25-26
Jesus said unto her, I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live: and whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die. Believest thou this?
2 Corinthians 4:17-18
For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory; while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen: for the things which are seen are temporal; but the things which are not seen are eternal.
2 Corinthians 5:8
We are confident, I say, and willing rather to be absent from the body, and to be present with the Lord.
Revelation 21:4
And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.
Psalm 34:18
The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.
Romans 8:28
And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.
Matthew 5:4
Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted.
My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion for ever.
John 11:25-26
Jesus said unto her, I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live: and whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die. Believest thou this?
2 Corinthians 4:17-18
For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory; while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen: for the things which are seen are temporal; but the things which are not seen are eternal.
2 Corinthians 5:8
We are confident, I say, and willing rather to be absent from the body, and to be present with the Lord.
Revelation 21:4
And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.
Psalm 34:18
The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.
Romans 8:28
And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.
Matthew 5:4
Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted.